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Curiosity is powerful. It is the antithesis of assumption and the quiet antidote to judgment. Lately, I’ve been catching myself repeating the same core sentiment with my adult clients: Expectations come with disappointment; curiosity comes with mystery. ​When we hold onto expectations, we are essentially trying to script the ending of a story that is still being written. But when we pivot to curiosity, we lean into the unknown. We allow the story to unfold rather than forcing

During my recent 96-hour fast, I experienced a level of psychological clarity that I can only describe as intoxicating. It was a headspace so profound that I desperately wanted to stay there. I couldn't hold onto it forever, but the experience shifted something inside me. Now, as I plan my next fast, I find myself sitting with a new question: Will I have the same willpower and discipline this time, now that I know exactly what kind of mental magic is waiting for me on the oth

​Some days are just more exhausting than others. ​Recently, I have been wandering a bit in this space of trying to truly understand what God's plan is for me. I thought I knew a few months ago, but that dream was destroyed. ​I should have known better, honestly. The idea required others to be built, and if I have learned anything in the last six years, it is that people will always disappoint you. It is easy for someone to make a promise or say something out of fear. But when

It was well into Book 3 of my life. My youngest had just graduated from kindergarten, and we were on our way to a celebratory dinner. The energy in the van was high, full of that specific, bittersweet milestone magic. ​Then, my son shouted from the back seat: "Baby ducks!" ​He had a stuffed duck as a lovey for much of his life, so I was initially distracted, lost in a fleeting wave of nostalgia for his toddler years. But then he yelled it again, louder this time: "Look, mom!

This is not for the 99. This is for the 1. ​I only need one person to hear this story. In fact, in my mind, the fewer people who read this, the better. Especially the chapters yet to come. ​I have to trust God and the universe that the path I am on will lead me to him. ​My solemate. ​Because I am a very unique woman, I am not looking for just anyone. I am looking for someone who has the capacity to love me enough. ​For example, you cannot predict my moods based on a typical m

After running hard for 20 weeks, almost straight, navigating more external peace disruptions than I have ever had, while continuing to hold space for my children, my students, and my clients, I hit a wall. Maybe the wall hit me. Who knows. Either way, I was left with a choice: continue on the same trajectory, pushing myself even harder and risking burnout, or take radical action. I chose radical action in the form of radical self-care. I started a fast. My body naturally lose

The one thing I am certain of. Sometimes I wish I would meet my solemate before I made my return but I fall back on a Bible verse. "Seek and you will find..." There is more to that verse but you can look it up if you are interested. In order to find, I must seek.

This was never going to work out. Especially, right now. All because of one thing, the intention behind the quest. The intention did not align with the Universe. God. I feel silly knowing the truth in that, but still choosing to seek. I find it fascinating that there is still space for improvement. Space for growth. Almost like a tree, minus the fact that they do have boundaries. I have been in a space of joy. I had to lean into my sickness, which meant sleeping it off. Three

Me, right now. Which allows me space to wallow. I am the biggest baby when sick. Sick, sick. Not man cold or mom cold. A fever that takes me down. Then I walllow. Loneliness seems louder. The desire to be cared for. Then my helicopter mom comes in. She did take my youngest so I could sleep. She also managed dinner duty. And driving experience for my oldest. I feel grateful for my village. It is small but mighty. But that never helps when you are shaking from a fever, hacking

This is it. The harmony of this part. No pressure to seek but rather be. Maybe the push to begin this journey was more about this journey. Documenting this crazy, amazing life. Full of too many possibilities and options. I do feel a pull towards a path. It is the most beautiful path. And my children along for the journey. Soon they will start their own journeys, like roots of a plant. If you do not know what I am talking about, go to Home Depot right now and de pot a plant. I

The return on investment was not worth it. I think I knew eventually I would be here, but I did not foresee it happening so quickly. But then again, I see my time outside of all of my requirements (work, school, internship) as precious. Finding a reason to spend time meeting people over time with my children or myself was never going to happen. I think I also had a very unrealistic view of what I was actually capable of doing. Long hours, not just a 9-5 type of situation, but

Here is my thought process. I will remain within the box of being a member of society. But why not push against it? This is kind of one of the cruelest storylines. I hate it. And each layer deeper within discovery just makes me hate it even more. Tonight was understanding that we all have the capacity to heal. Long story. My system felt that one. I yelled at God, "You could have!" I know this is the path because He chose one for many lives. But it is probably the most isolat

There are mainly two types of people in this world. The Fearful The Fearless Who are you? How do you make decisions? Are you a thrill seeker? How do you plan? What do you do in your free time? There was a point in this journey where I was ridden with anxiety. This weight was debilitating. One day, I thought, what are my options? I begin a list on my phone. A. Work part-time for multiple organizations. B. Work full-time for one organization. C., D., E., F., G., H., I... A is t

(SEU Worship) Another pivot. I think maybe I have been experimenting to see what best works for me. Mainly because this story is about me but also we know, you put on your mask first, then help your children. They are and will always be my number one priority. It does feel like I am in a space of peace. Yes, my life is chaotic. I am a 100% custodial parent of three children. I am a part-time employee mentoring students in the area. I am a full-time graduate student. I am in a

I could pay to be "perfect." Women do it all the time. Pay to have the boobs they want. Or the nose. I could. A few minor adjustments. But I am also curious to see what happens when... Curiosity! I find so many parts in my life, I am curious. What happens? Most recently it has surrounded my life. Professionally and personally. I never feel disappointed about the outcome, because being curious prevents a person from having expectations. You continue to wonder. This why I am co

At one point in this journey, I chose not to be heard. And I found so much peace there. It is hard not to want to turn around and retreat back into the peace of my life. I much prefer the quiet spaces. I am an introvert, but I am realizing that the quest must continue. Unfortunately, I tried to record a video to upload to this blog, but it was too long. The video was just a recording of my voice explaining this. There is flow within the path of my career. I am also connectin

By Need to Breathe I love this song for some reason. I originally wanted to weave my thread throughout my story, but I decided to tell the "now." There are plenty of pre-stories, but this is the story of now. I hope that, if anything from reading these, you will learn something. I know what I know is already impactful because I use some of the things that worked for me with clients. Not saying that this story is worthy of your time. It is not really, in the big picture. Even

Today, I am grateful for: My morning tea in my handmade mug right before work. My walk during my break. The necessary refuel. Dinner for later A full day of impact. My family Harmony

I wanted to fully develop this experience before re-entering the world. I had a vision of how it would look and how a person could interact with it all. I find myself pointing fingers at my current life—my job, school, field experience, and kids. It’s true that, during the brief moments I had free from those responsibilities, I was busy organizing or planning for what was next. So, I just have to take this step forward and build yet another plane mid-air. I believe I’m well-s

In a single moment, everything can change. One moment can bring joy or sorrow, connection or loss. I am reminded of this profound truth when I reflect on the significance of Christ's death—it means our eternal salvation. Yet, I also feel the weight of my husband’s death, which serves as a poignant reminder of life’s fragility. As I ponder the brevity of our time on Earth, I find myself questioning why God created something so transient, knowing we have no way to gauge when ou